The Growth Triangle

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The Growth Triangle

“What should I do to heal/grow/expand myself?”

I get asked this a lot because, well, I’ve done a great deal of work on myself and I lead Transformative Tech.

Makes sense.

I’d listen to what someone was struggling with, or what they hope for in their lives, then, I’d talk through the different programs I’ve done or know about.

Eventually, a framework for looking at growth arose.

I’ve never seen this one before and this is my 1st time sharing it publicly.

Imagine a triangle.

On the left are paradigm-shifting tools.

These are the tools that allow you to see the world, your life, your problems in a new way.

These tools are like a trampoline next to a fence line. Your vision is below the fence. You jump on the trampoline, and on each bounce, you see above the fence to the wideness of life beyond your constraint – whatever that may be.

In this corner, you’ll find psychedelics, breathwork, death (of a loved one or your own near miss), breathtaking landscapes (this happened for me in Antarctica and Burning Man), meditation retreats, heartbreak, and more.

For a period, it changes you, then you come down and try to hold what you learned as best you can, for as long as you can.

On the bottom are capacity-building tools.

These are the tools that stretch your capacity for experiencing the world and your life.

These tools are like dirt that you pile beneath your trampoline. By raising the floor, you lower the fence line. In this corner you’ll find meditation, heart-rate variability training, sleep training, conscious listening, and anything that gives you the ability to stretch the rubber band of you further in a healthy way.

You’re less triggered because you have a buffer.

Today’s transformative tech is 50% here.

This complements the paradigm shift tools because when you jump on a trampoline, you clear the fence line faster, giving you a longer look at the horizon beyond your limitations.

On the right are pattern-breaking tools.

These are the tools that unwind the patterns that drive us unconsciously.

This is the hair knot, the knotted, messy, hard to find the beginning, middle, or end of it inside of you. To break the pattern is to tug on the root cause, 1st this way, and then the other, slipping out one knot, then again.

Every release here lowers the fence itself bit by bit.

On this side, you’ll find talk therapy, CBT, the Hoffman Process, Landmark, Conscious Leadership Group, and much more.

This is complemented by paradigm shifts, the same way using conditioner helps work out the tangle, in bigger chunks by and by. This works with capacity building in giving you the patience to work the knot.

Corners

This is when you say aloud, but my X thing does both.

This is true.

Psychedelic therapy works so well because it combines pattern breaking and paradigm shifting all at once.

Joe Dispenza is growing in popularity because it combines capacity building and paradigm shifting.

Conscious Leadership Group works so well because it combines pattern breaking with capacity building.

Interactions

It is my belief that the fastest way to grow is to work the entire triangle, moving as you are called, from side to side.

I believe in intentional movement because as you’ve heard me say, I believe we have 10-15 years to shift, which means we have to get moving. 😊

I do not believe in speed for speed’s sake and I haven’t witnessed people truly being able to bypass the time true healing and growth takes, but to work the triangle appears to ensure we are moving intentionally towards our truest selves.

I have seen people grow dramatically just working one side.

This can absolutely happen. However, I have seen many people get stuck.

The person who runs from ceremony to ceremony, never quite filling the hole inside or getting to a place where life doesn’t trigger them (the mediation retreats of Asia are filled with westerners who go from one to the next.)

Or the person who has been in talk therapy for 20 years on the same problem.

This can become a mental joyless process on its own.

Or the person who has biohacked and optimized themselves to the hilt and there’s no psychological flexibility or room for the ineffable.

There is no joy.

I believe that full triangle is the way to go.

Love,
Nichol

P.S. Please, please comment! I’d love to hear what you’re doing or your own categorization of growth tools.

Comments (12)

  1. Edo Ceder

    Loved the division to peek tools, ground building tools, and reprogramming tools. Taking this article to our stake holders to help them understand the wellness world a little more.

  2. Pam Dupuy

    Nichol
    I love this write up about growth. I think the triangle and trampoline analogies sooo useful. Thank you! 🙏🏼

  3. Paul Chavez

    Thanks!
    I am focused on creating systems that allow rewarding the process of healing that blends giving, receiving, and acknowledges the self that includes everyone.
    Start where the suffering is highest.
    In the United States, homelessness, substance use disorders, and mental health.
    Thanks again!

  4. Cynthis

    I love this model for growth! Thanks for sharing.

  5. Zenka Caro

    This is a great triangle – when we get out of the victim, perpetrator, savor – we can bounce on the trampoline of paradigm, capacity and pattern breaking. When we tell new stories about what is possible, and come together in community we do all these three things at once. Our subconscious mind in the history of our people is it in pattern, a rut – that can’t take us where we need to go. Transformative tech and experiences which truly change and astound our frame of reference and a paradigm are right here. The only true way we can progress is by each of us jumping, and holding each other‘s hands once we step off. Pathfinders need community as we stabilize a new way of seeing the world and what is possible. This is one of those communities that can change the world.

  6. Jaymes Hines

    Hi Nichol,
    Great read here on the journey of “What should I do to heal/grow/expand myself?”. I look to re-read several times throughout the day and for a while in the hope to gleam more personal insights and understanding towards a better self. There are a few words and phrases that do stand out for me: paradigm-shifting tools, capacity-building tools, pattern-breaking tools, Interactions, and intention.

  7. Ken Johnson

    Thank you

  8. Jim

    Hi Nichol,
    Really enjoy your model. Helps see the whole picture and represents the progressive in and out nature of growing awareness. I think it can give encouragement and some insight on how to proceed.

  9. Brian Gilan

    Thanks for writing this, Nichol! I’m optimistic that technology to induce lucid dreams will be an important addition to paradigm-shifting tools. Lucid dreaming experiences can sometimes be more profound than psychedelic experiences.

    Rythmia (https://rythmia.com/) is also a good example that hits on the full triangle using a combo of ayahuasca, breathwork, yoga, meditation, classes, integration sessions, healthy food, etc.

  10. Marcus

    This is exactly what I needed to see! Thank you Nichol! I have been asking myself the same question on how to heal and expand – and your triangle gives me a framework that I can use to become aware of what to seek next.

    I wonder if you would consider encounters and interactions with remarkable and unusual people as a part of the paradigm-shifting category? I know for me that some people have really changed my perspective on life. Both short encounters, like meeting someone on the train, and interactions over time, like having a mentor and getting insight into someone else’s different life.

  11. Troy

    Amen.

  12. Grace

    Love this, maps well

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